Thursday, May 13, 2010

Regina needs your help!

Alright, best blog friends-

my friend and co worker Regina

needs your help!regina 1

She was telling all of us her quandary today in the office

and we did not know what to think!

We thought about where we could get the best advice in all of the universe…and I said, let’s ask my blog readers.

They are genius!

Regina thought that would be perfect.

Sit back.

You are not going to believe this.regina 5

So, Regina meets a guy a month or so ago and he is really nice.

They talk on the phone a little and she is totally digging him.

He is 31 and in Regina’s world, that is perfect.

Regina is a baby (24) and she has had it up to here

with all the crummy Philly boys.

This guy seems stable.

{Sort of like my sweet, sweet, Gary}gary adams jr

They decide to meet and watch a movie together.

Fun, right?

Well, the movie is going along nicely.

Everything seems fine.

They are each perched on their respective seat cushions when-

suddenly, the guy contorts his body in an alarming way.

Regina is startled.

She doesn’t know what to do or say.

She says nothing.

A few minutes later it happens again.regina 3

And then there is a sound that comes out of his mouth.

Unlike any other sound she has ever heard. 

And then the contorting happens repeatedly.

And the sound comes out again and again.

Regina asks if everything is ok and they guy says

‘I have a bad back injury.’

And then he leaves.regina 4

The next night they are talking on the phone.

She hears the weird sound once again.

She brings it up.

He states, ‘My back is really hurting.

My Mom gave me a little blue pill that is supposed to help.’

And that is all he says about it.collage 3

Interesting, right?

Regina wants to give him a chance but this does seem like bizarre behavior.

Our co workers think he might have Tourett’s Syndrome.regina 2

Should she keep talking to him

even though he is lying about his back?

Or should she move on?   photo story friday 

What would you do, wise readers?

What would you do?

 

68 comments:

Jessica said...

I think I would try to find out what is really wrong with him. Maybe take the time to get to know him a little bit better so that he would feel comfortable enough to tell me the truth.

Unless I felt threatened when these little episodes happen. Then I would just cut all ties and move on. The way you explain it does make the experience seem a little scary so I am leaning towards option 2.

Alicia said...

Wow! Well, even though it does sound bizarre, I would try to get to the bottom of it (if she likes him that much). Because, he could be embarrassed about it, and that is why he just left.

Kristina P. said...

I have no idea. I think it's super weird. But if she wants to date him, this is going to be an issue. She needs to confront.

H.K. said...

I think she should still get to know him and find out what's going on. She liked him even with that weird body problem, so she should give him a chance and go on another date with him and talk to him what's going on.

Anna K. said...

Um, if he's not being up front about a little thing like this what else will he not be open about later on?

And what kind of little blue pill are we talkin' about?

latree said...

I think, knowing that he's been lying in the beginning is just so uncomfortable. She should ask for truth to continue, or...


just an opinion :)

Kristine said...

I think it would be good if she went on one more date with him...and had dinner. Something that required face to face interaction and then she could get a better picture if it was Tourrettes or back pain by his facial expressions? I don't know...you sure want him to be honest, but if he is really wanting her to get to know him before laying out his medical history, it might be nice to give him one more try? JMO

Anita Johnson said...

I'm so glad I'm years beyond dating. Something sounds odd to me.It seems if he had a medical condition he would have said so and there would have been no problem. A back injury AND a pill...I guess I don't like the sound of it. It's easy to say move on from here, but I wouldn't go on a date alone again with him. I'll add your friend to my prayers tonight.

Busy Bee Suz said...

Regina is super cute and normal.
Ditch him.
Run for your sanity.
He is coming to you with baggage...and I don't mean the 'carry on' baggage either.
The red flag is flying...SEE IT.

Tracy Griffin - Artist said...

RUN REGINA!!! That little blue pill was NOT for his back, but more for his "front" if you know what I mean! Yikes girl!

GunDiva said...

Ask him point-blank.

If she doesn't like the answer or it doesn't feel "right" it's time to move on. And, seriously, the whole "my mom gave me a pill" thing creeps me out. Sounds like he still lives with Mommy or at the very least is far too dependent on her. He should be seeing his DOCTOR for his back pain, not his MOTHER.

Hilary said...

Here's what I take from Regina's account:

1) It sounds like Tourettes to me too. A bit of Googling led to this page for what it's worth. Of course it could be any blue pill for any condition but it does make me wonder. http://www.viewpoints.com/Clonidine-HCL-Clonidine-review-af5e8

2) If it is, I'd be very concerned about his lying to her. If he's not lying, I'd want to know more about what happened to his back.

3) Mostly, I'd want to know why a 31 year old man is relying on his mother for medication? This is the part that screams "RUN" in my ear.

Marilyn said...

Ask him flat out and if he lies or hedges then dump him.

Hey, Nicky is better. He ate some and drank water. He will be ok now. We are wondering if it might have been a sore throat. Whatever, we are grateful. Thanks for the prayers!!

Alice said...

are you kidding? as beautiful as regina is ... i'd move on! if he's that weird right out of the starting gate, i can't imagine it's going to get any better - lol! and regina is going to find someone else without the quirks :).

Dawn said...

i don't know... but i love your pictures :)

Mari said...

It really does sound like Tourettes. He is probably embarrassed by it, so he doesn't want to tell her.
I think she needs to ask him. I've taken care of people with back issues and haven't seen that kind of behavior, even immediately after surgery!

LceeL said...

Relationships are built on trust - and he doesn't trust. Give him a chance to open up - but one chance only. If he can't come straight, then move on.

Angela said...

His Mumma is giving him pills?? Can't he organise that himself? Dear me my sweet girl, run. Please. Now. Honesty is the best policy and HE needs to be looking for someone he can tell this too and it doesn't sound like your friend is her.

brainella said...

I'm thinking Angela might be right on this. If he's not going to be honest, it's best to just run now.

Emily said...

Weird. I think that if she does like him and want to see him again, she should confront him and ask him what's going on. Honesty is the best policy!

Kelly said...

If he does have a disorder like Tourette's then it's possible that he wants her to get to know him better before sharing that piece of info. Many people would never give a person a chance knowing something like that.

I agree with the suggestion to give him another shot, but to do something face-to-face in a quiet environment where she gauge more fully whether he's being truthful.

Buckeroomama said...

If the relationship is to go any further, he needs to be able to trust her and vice versa. If he is not able to be more forthcoming about whatever condition he has (something that he probably could not help), it will be an issue. Not just with that, but most likely with other things that might crop up as well. On the other hand, how comfortable is she about continuing to see him and giving him more time to be comfortable enough to tell her what's really wrong with him? It all depends on her own comfort level.

Freckles & Dimples Photography said...

um, well lets start with the crummy philly guy statement....and I can say this because I went to college in philly and met quite a few of em myself. stay.away.from.philly.guys!!!! hehe, partially kidding.
it doesnt matter that he's 31, there are plenty of older guys who are big dorks. I would say that since she is absolutely beautiful, young and hip, she should consider passing on this guy based on his bizarre behavior thus far. who up and leaves in the middle of a movie without saying anything but his back hurt? and the little blue pill? cmon!! run, regina, run!!

Dot O said...

I feel a very uncomfortable feeling about the situation through and through. My gut tells me that she should just move on now before she invests anymore time in him. Whether he has Tourette's or whether his back is bad, leaving her that night is totally unacceptable. Something just isn't right about the whole thing...

Did she get any gut feeling on this?

Josh, Steph, The Boys and Maddie said...

Give him a chance to be upfront and honest. She needs to communicate with him how she feels and that she needs to know what is really going on. She can't pursue a relationship with someone if she doesn't know his background. If he has tourette's then she needs to decide now if that is something she can handle. If not then she needs to move on so he can move on. But she needs to find out if that is what he really has or not. And a blue pill? I would ask his mom what it is for.

Casey Freeland said...

Run. Just run.

Brooke G. said...

I would be running, not walking!!

Chris said...

If he's lying (and she's sure about that), cut the ties now, while they're less strong.

Though it doesn't really sound like Tourett's -- that's really more about the ticks, than the outbursts.

Caroline said...

Oh gosh...I have no idea. If it were me, I would end it. Something sounds fishy...

debi9kids said...

Hmmm, very interesting...
I think sadly, if it is tourettes, it's so hard for people to admit and sad to think that he might be lying and ruin what could be a good relationship.

I have a sister that has tourettes and her ticks are WAY worse when she's nervous or excited and that might've been the case with him...

I don't know, but I think I would try to find out what is up with him. Esp if she really does like him.

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

Regina, if he can't be honest with you about his medical condition, then you may want to keep on stepping. I dated a guy that had problems with keeping his food down. He told me before we went on our first date. Honestly, I couldn't deal with it. I was just not the right one for him. If that's the case, then he needs to come clean and let you know instead of lying about it.

Pam Emmons said...

It's not Touretts. My hubby has it, and this sounds nothing like it.
And yep. She needs to be done.

hip chick said...

Ask him point blank what the deal is. If he is not honest then that is the type of behavior that she can expect for the entire time they are together. The thing that those of us over 24 have figured out is that generally people don't change. In fact, if he left her at the movies then he will do that type of thing over and over. I would move on if I were her. She is young, pretty, and seems pretty smart. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

blueviolet said...

She needs to go with her gut. If it bothers her, and it sounds like it does, she should just move on.

Adeena said...

Sounds super weird to me. If it were me, I'd move on.

Eternal Lizdom said...

I'd give him one last shot at being up front and honest about whatever is going on. Someone I know online had an odd experience- went out to dinner with a guy, they hit it off wonderfully and really liked each other. They go to meet up for a second date... turns out he has a paralyzing fear of heights or parking garages or bridges or something and ends up in the fetal position on the parking garage floor and can't be talked down and security gets involved and so on...

Needless to say, there was no second date. If the guy had just been up front about it all, there never would have been an issue.

I think the bigger red flag is that "his mom gives him a blue pill." Uh... shouldn't a grown man be getting his own medications and maybe know the name of the med he's taking?

Colleen said...

"Mom gave him a blue pill" was the weird part. Really!

Krystyn said...

I'm a little weirded out by the fact that his mom gave him a pill at 31. I mean Tourettes is something that is manageable....but if she's uncomfortable now, then I think she should probably move on. If she likes the guy, then give him a chance.

TechnoBabe said...

She could keep him as a phone friend and get to know him better on the phone before she sees him in person again. And she should tell him she is suspicious of it being just a back problem and tell him she wants to have everything open and honest if she is going to count him a friend.

jennykate77 said...

Wow, hmmmm. This is a quandary. I'm kind of agreeing with you guys...sounds like it might be TS, but like another commenter has said, it is manageable. Being 31, you would think he would have it under control by now. Doesn't sound like back pain to me...that sounds like a cover-up. You don't want to start any relationship under false pretenses. That's just a bad way to start off. I'm kind of thinking your friend needs to hold out for Mr. Right.

Darlene said...

I say she needs to move on. If he is lying now (from the start) it will just get worse!

Joanna Jenkins said...

I don't know what's wrong with him but the BIG RED FLAG I saw was the part about his mom giving him a little blue pill". Now THAT'S scary. How old is he anyway????

And, yes, he probably does have an illness and is afraid to admit it cuz most women would dump him before getting a chance to know him.

:-(
jj

PS I want to hear how this all works out please

Run DMT said...

Ok, that is very bizarre and "back injury" was TOTALLY NOT what I was thinking. My response is far too vulgar, so I'll leave you this link to an SNL Digital Short that might explain his behavior a bit better. It's funny as hell, but please don't watch it in front of the kiddos.

http://www.hulu.com/watch/47604/saturday-night-live-digital-short-j-in-my-pants

At 24, there are sooooo many fish in the sea. Throw this bad "back injury" bass back!

Mental P Mama said...

I have a red flag feeling. She should ask him to level with her before continuing. I have a bad case of scoliosis, and my back hurts plenty. I am not buying his story one bit. And what 34 year-old takes little blue pills from his mommy??? Yup. Red Flag Alert!

April said...

I definitely say she should try to get to the bottom of this. I'm sorry, but I would be a bit creeped out by his behavior. Now, there may be a legit reason for what's happening, but I would certainly poke and prod until I find out. You HAVE to do a follow-up on this one!

photowannabe said...

I'm with the majority and say run as fast as you can.
The blue pill is a huge red flag to me..His Mom gave it to him...come on!! That's crazy.

Amie said...

If you have to even ask if you should move on, then I think that is your answer right there.

Shelle said...

Despite the odd behaviour, i wouldn't see him again - he's living with his mother which says to me he is not independent and responsible....this for me is a big flag. If she things he's lying there's a double whammy! then there's the fact that she's asking for advice...if there are questions in her heart... i say don't go on...she doesn't need people to say she should when she already knows she shouldn't.

not so much advice, just my take on the sit!

mamamia said...

Is there any way she can meet his mom? Then she can find out if he really does have a back issue of some kind, and what is causing the weird noise. However, I would be very hesitant to get too involved if you think he is lying.

gringationcancun said...

First of all, your friend is gorgeous! Love her eyes.

It sounds like Tourettes or similar to be, but I'm no expert.

Regina - My guess is that he's probably embarrassed about it! I'd say just ask him very directly about it, and say whatever it is, it's not going to bother you. Or tell him that you'll wait until he feels comfortable enough to tell you about it.

Who knows? It may be a back injury, but it sounds weird that he won't tell you more about these pills or their side effects.

If he keeps lying, forget about the guy.

gringationcancun said...

wait, I just saw the "lives with his mom" part.

Hmmm lies, lives with his mom, and can't get his own medicine?? I feel bad for the guy bc he obviously has some condition, but there are too many red flags to ignore.

If you don't get a satisfactory explanation soon, get out while you can, girl.

Tracey Axnick said...

Regina, honey, my husband has had 2 back injuries and lives with back pain DAILY. I've never seen ANYTHING like this.

I'm thinking this young man has a seizure disorder (epilepsy, or some other seizure disorder).... they are not as uncommon as you think. However, a lot of people who have them are very sensitive about them, because they have been discriminated against and/or lost jobs due to them.

If you like him, and want to continue the relationship (if even just on a friend level), just tell him he needs to level with you... you're not going to judge him, but you need to know.

Good luck!

PS: Bec - the pictures are BEAUTIFUL - love the pink flowering branches - absolutely beautiful!

Leslie said...

Love the photos this week! very interesting scenario... I would say unless she gets a good explanation that makes sense, it's probably not worth it! The last thing you need in a relationship is dishonesty!

Erin said...

I just love how you put in all your photos in your posts!

And I am thinking she's awful young to be worrying about so much...time to say we've had a great time but let's just be friends!

Frau said...

Honesty is the best..sounds fishy!

RoseBelle said...

Sure does sound weird. He's probably insecure about his illness which is why he lied.It depends how much Regina is into him. If what he's doing bothers her, then, I think it's best she moves on.

By MelCole of PA said...

Hi there, first of all, thanks for dropping by my blog. Now for the story, after looking at your pictures (which are really impressive, what camera are you using?) and reading the story and tons of comments, I suggest for Regina to move on. Yep, discontinue the relationship as good as she can (without making the guy hurt). The "weird sound" during their talk on the phone before he admits that he has a back pain, does sound super weird! And the "blue pill" (know what kind of pill is it!It could be more than pain reliever drugs or he might have some kind of addiction). As what people shared here in their encounter on Tourret's syndrome, the guy that Regina is meeting, is just super weird! His behavior made me scared. It sounds like he's trying to control her too, like she wants he to have pity on him (so they can have a one night stand?). I heard some people are like that. They want to make things in a hurry and control the other person. So Regina, please, move on.

Queenie Jeannie said...

If you want to have a relationship with ANYONE (and regardless of the kind of relationship), you have to be honest. Otherwise you aren't being your true self, so you don't let someone else like and enjoy your true self!

I would kindly ask for some more details. AND he said his Mom gave him a blue pill. Is he still living with his Mom??? (red flag alert!)

Los said...

Weird ... I have no idea what I'd do ... sounds like it could be something serious (maybe some sort of cancer?). I wish I could help.

Helen said...

hmmm hard one.

I looked up tourett and ik seems to match up. So he's probably embarresed to bring it up or doesn't want to as not knowing her enough to talk about it.

And the my RED flag goes up by the sentence metioning his mum giving him a little blue pill for this...

I'd say she should meet him up for coffee somewhere and bring it up. Sitting in a corner or something a little discreet, that may help him open up a little? and it's still a safe place for her then.

PennsylvaniaBelle said...

Tell Regina not to look for a bf for at least 4 or 5 more years..once you find the "one" the party's over! I feel bad for him..I bet he has something wrong and he is trying to hide it because he really likes you.

Lisa @ Boondock Ramblings said...

Confront him and if he doesn't come out with what's going on straight up...move on.

Mom Taxi Julie said...

Tell her to R-U-N!! The guy sounds really whacked!!

EllieNat said...

Very entertaining post.

Run. Don't look back.

Mighty M said...

If she really likes him and he seems otherwise legit find out about the back. If he has Tourette's he may not want to admit it. Keep us posted! :)

God's Favorite Shoes! said...

I know i am wrong for this but why did I laugh? WTH is going on? WTH!! I say leave him alone. If he doesn't just offer the info maybe he doesn't think she should no.

Tourette's? Wth? Please update us!

If he does have something like that, he should warn her. Don't just be sitting next to me and start freaking out! WTH!!

God's Favorite Shoes! said...

I meant "know"...not "no"...it's the English teacher in me:(

God's Favorite Shoes! said...

Okay, so I'm blogreading your posts and I read this issue out loud to my bf. His words:

"He has a bad back. Having a bad back can make you do stupid sh*t. You can't even almost hide having Tourette Syndrome."

He says that she should know if he is lying about his back sooner or later. She should find out why his back was injured.

*by the way, the bf said "she takes bad ass pictures".
...then he said that's f*ed up.