Thursday, April 2, 2009

My Mom and Catalogs


Last week I joined Mama’s Losin’ It
Writers Workshop
for the first time!
It was SO much fun.
Ridiculously fun!
I talked about beds….that is fun stuff, right?!
So this week, I thought I would join again.
I mean why not?
It’s not like I have 4 loads of laundry to wash and fold-
Dishes in the sink-
12 court reports to write before tomorrow-
Homework to help with-
Blah, Blah, Blah
There were 5 topics to pick from.
I am picking the one that I shouldn’t.
In what ways are you turning into your mother?

My Mommy HATES when I write about her 'issues' on the blog.
She did NOT like when I wrote
My Mom and cell phones.
She did NOT like when I wrote
My Mom and Coach purses.
And sadly, she will not like this post either.
What can I say?
A girls gotta do what a girls gotta do.
This is just TOO great of an opportunity to pass by.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I proudly present,
My Mom and Catalogs.

Do you even know what catalogs are?
I mean, who in the world still looks at catalogs?
Let me tell you who: My Mother.
My Mom LOVES to look at catalogs.
All kinds of catalogs.
Mostly clothing catalogs.
Many of you women may be thinking,
How lovely. Clothes catalogs would be fun.
Well, let me assure you,
The clothes catalogs my mom looks at are horrendous.
One day I was sitting at my mom’s kitchen table
I saw a HIDEOUS mexican outfit on the cover of a catalog.
I quickly THREW that catalog in the trash.
Well, wouldn’t you know, 10 minutes later,
My Mommy comes racing down the hallway!
She wanted to know why on earth I had thrown that catalog out.
I reminded my Mom that she doesn’t like Southwestern style clothing.
She told me it was time for me to go.

My Mom’s favorite catalog is called
Blair.

She just loves Blair.
I think Blair is nice.
If you are over 100.
If you are under 100 I think you should avoid Blair at all costs.
I’m just saying…
There are some of the most terrible polyester blends
still being produced in our country.
And Blair manufactures
90% of their clothes from those blends.
Do you get any catalogs at your house?
We don’t.
I don’t think I will ever be a catalog shopper.
So even though this post was supposed to be about
How I am turning into my Mother,
It’s really about how I will not
follow down her catalog strewn shopping path.
I love her so much.
I hope she doesn’t read today!
Cross your fingers for me!

46 comments:

Shawn said...

Hmm, your mom and my mom are an awfully lot alike. You aren't part of my family are ya?

April said...

OK, you really have me cracking up now! Oh, girl, you are going to be dead meat if your mom reads your post! LOL! No, I don't get catalogs...just isn't my thing. I've always hated purchasing something I can't see up close and personal, only to have to return it because it doesn't fit or doesn't look quite like it did on the pages of a catalog. After today, your mom might just give you the ol' heave ho! Good luck, my friend! Hee hee!

Elftea said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Elftea said...

Remind your mom that she is in your life and you blog about your life. If that doesn't work get some catalogs. Love your post and blog.

Busy Bee Suz said...

How funny.
I used to get a few...but I got them to stop wasting the paper/mailing...(GREEN)
My MIL gets them and still buys from them too.

Liz said...

This is just too funny! I like to look at catalogs but never order anything from them. I have to be able to see it in person or if it's clothes then try it on before buying.

Sally's World said...

too funny, you always make me smile...

Lolli said...

Oh, this is classic!! My Grandma was the same way, and when she passed away, the subscriptions were forwarded to my parent's house. She had magazines coming for YEARS. It was too funny. It was like she was constantly reminding them that she was still around, kind of. ;)

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

I love the picture of the granny smoking! That is a great one.

Funny post. The only catalog I like to get is JCrew (though funny this actually gets sent to my moms house). Occasionally a good "things to occupy your kids for hours" catalog is nice. They never work but there is always hope for the next issue...

Thanks for stopping by :)

mimi said...

The pictures you chose are hysterical! Catalogs....I used to be obsessed as well. I would get so excited when the post man came....oohh, what would it be today. Then I would window shop, rarely buying anything. I'm over that phase....because of the internet. Oy!

Blair...you had me laughing. My 95 yr old grandma loves it. I actually find myself scanning the pages when at her house. Double oy!

hermomsometimes said...

Shawn, I do not order out of catalogs. At least not clothes maybe jewlery. I buy some of my clothes online, so there. Anyway what is wrong with Blair?

Older mothers unite against this type of abuse from our loving daughters.

Noe Noe Girl...A Queen of all Trades. said...

Your mom and my Cdub must be related somehow!
I never get time to look at a catalog!

Cortney said...

Hahaahahah! Poor mom. That is funny stuff.

mamamia said...

lol, you make me laugh! this sounds like a very fun writing thing, i will ahve to check it out.

Cole said...

Hahaha! I refuse to shop from catalogs. However, my grandmother (and to some extent - my mom) love catalogs. I too throw them away as soon as I see them. Why encourage people to wear poly blend clothing?!

Jaime said...

my mom is crazy about catalogs too. i don't get the obsession

Eyeglasses & Endzones said...

Dude...what it is with moms and the catalogs...that is too funny!!

antoinettemariew@blogspot.com said...

cute blog, funny too cause mine this week was about my mom too! i'm like my mom, and now my son is following, in that we almost never have visitors at our house so we almost always have on pajamas or rags when we're home...no husband to impress at this point and my little one doesn't really care, lol! blessings...

He And Me + 3 said...

That is too funny. Never heard of Blair...hmmm

littletoesandcheerios said...

Give your Mom a big hug from me 'cause I like me a good catalog too! I just bought my Easter dress from looking at a catalog...saw it and ran in Fashion Bug and bought it...no hassle!
And I like to try to do cheaper versions of what the models are wearing.

blueviolet said...

Yep, the catalog era is a bygone era. You could secretly write a letter on your mom's behalf asking her to be removed from all those mailing lists and then she wouldn't get them and order from them!

Your mom told you it was time to go. LOL

Darlene said...

HAHAHAHA....I am ROFLOL at this! OK I definitely don't get Blair but (I hope you still like me) I LOVE catalogs!!!! Mine are mostly things like Pottery Barn, Wisteria, Ballards (home decor). Can we still be friends???????..lol

Melinda said...

Maybe you and I got switched at birth...I love to browse through catalogs, esp. if they are home decor catalogs or the Anthropologie catalog!!

LeAnna said...

HA! This is SO funny! I so remember when my grandmother would get the JCPenny's Christmas catalog, I thought it was the best thing ever to get to go through and circle what I wished Santa would bring me! HA! Great post!

Granny Smith said...

I hope this won't make you lose all respect for me, dear, but I also shop from the Blair catalog. And I'm still 12 years short of being 100. To be sure, I peruse the catalog then order from Blair on line. And some of my favorite clothes come from there, although I can't stand the horribly cute printed or embroidered things. Their fleece jackets are comfortable and come in wonderful colors and heather blends. I have even given there long-sleeved tees as gifts. Tell your mother that this was the reaction of at least one of your readers.

I loved the pics of your mother. And, as always, I enjoy a peek into your life.

BTW the word verification awaiting me is "sunkind" - very appropriate. May the sun shine brightly on you!

xxxx

4 Lettre Words said...

This is great! Your mom is awesome and so are you!

jlo said...

Funny. I think you are busted though...

Stacey said...

It could be worse- it could be porn mags!!! (sorry, had to say it). I agree, polyester blends will never be cool.

Kristi said...

I love the Eddie Bauer SALE catalog! :-)

suburbanmom said...

Very funny! I like the pictures too. ;) And yes, catalogs are a dying art!

Femin Susan said...

toooo funny.
Thanks for stopping by my blog and your kind comment feel free to visit again.
Keep posting......

smiles4u said...

Too funny! Your mom is so sweet looking and everything you write about her is so sweet. I am really thankful that you have such a close loving relationship with her.

thezeninyou said...

That Hilarious! I can't remember the last time I bought something from a catalog... I think maybe something from Speigels in 1988...lol.

Suzanne said...

I've seen Blair and I agree...it stinks. But I have to say, I love catalogs! I think I'd like your mom.

jennykate77 said...

Too funny! I think she's so cute...and you're so cute...so, that's one way you're like your mom! The catalog thing cracks me up. Up until just a few years ago, my mom would always order from Chadwicks (a clothing catalog). I finally convinced her that the clothes were old-gradma clothes...she hasn't ordered since.

Hope you had a fabulous Friday!! Enjoy your weekend! *muah*

Debbie said...

We do still get some catalogs. How in the world do you manage not to get any?
But I know the hideous ones of which you speak:)

Kara S said...

LOL!!! You crack me up! Your poor mother. I totally agree that Blair keeps the polyester blend companies in business. Would you believe that my MIL gave me a sweater/cardigan thing from Blair a couple of Christmas' ago? I about died! I do wear it - in the house, when I'm really really cold, as an extra layer. No way will I wear it in public ... EVER. LOL

Lace said...

Oh goodness, your mom sounds awesome. I can't even lie.... I love to look at catalogs too! I NEVER order from them, but boy do I love to browse them!

jen@odbt said...

LOL - I love catalogs too! It's fun to dream and "window shop".

Kidd Family said...

hahahahahah! i laughed myself all the way through this post. i know exactly what catalogs you were referring to! soooo funny!... but, i, too enjoy a good catalog now and then. browsing online just isn't the same. although, let's be real, aren't we all WAY more likely to buy something online than to actually send in a check for a catalog order! :)

Mama Kat said...

Your mom is adorable! I support her catalog reading and viewing as long as the purchasing is kept to a minimum. Has anyone introduced her to online shopping?? I highly reccommend!

Julie Rivera Photography said...

Hysterical! I love it when my mother "recommends" an outfit from one of her catalogues for me. Um, how do you politely say no to that?!

Mommynightowl said...

I love catalogs. I used to get delias in high school and circle everything I wanted and ask my mom for it and she'd say no everytime but I'd ask whenever a new catalog came in

theArthurClan said...

Oh my stinkin' heck - you are so funny Rebeckah! If those catalogs ever come near my house...they are heading right towards the burn pile. Too funny!

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